Caregiver

Caregiver

noun

1.

a person who cares for someone who is sick or disabled.

2.

an adult who cares for an infant or child.

What does that term mean to you? What does it take to step into the role of caregiver? 

Could you provide that care for your spouce? 

Theoretically, I'm sure most people posed with that question would answer with a resounding, YES!

Why would you even think twice? If the person you love enough to share the rest of your life with is at a point where they need you to care for them, to hold their hand through trials, then I would hope you would be proud to stand strong for them.

It is so much easier to fantasize about life's possibilities and what you would do when faced with certain challenges. Or even that the challenges you could face would be obvious and easy to point to the root. But the sad reality is that most of our trials are not the way the TV shows and movies portray them. Yes, there is drama and there are tears because there is pain. Physical and emotional pain. But you don't see the slow dissapearing act of people you counted on for support or all of the decisions and questions needing quick answers. 

Cancer is an evil that scars all it touches. It is a creaping and silent offender that slowly brings you down and knocks the wind out of you at the same time. It forces you to wear a mask. You see the mask when you look in the mirror, and when you look at your spouce. Both trying to be as strong as you can for eachother. 

Clinging to the ever optimistic mantra, "This too shall pass."

Issolation.

I won't tell you what we go through on a daily, weekly, monthly and quarterly basis. You honestly don't want to know or be burdened with the heart ache and struggle. Or so we think. So, we remain silent.

I think that a caregiver is more than Doctors appointments, pharmacies, medication schedules, diet, activity and cleaning. I think that a true caregiver is a pillar of strength standing strong for their ward to lean on. Sadly it takes a serious toll on both. There are nights with tear stained pillows and day dreams of better days when this will all turn into a memory.